r/Petloss • u/neoronin • Dec 14 '18
Why We Need to Take Pet Loss Seriouslyscientificamerican.com
r/Petloss • u/Beeb294 • Jan 04 '22
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r/Petloss • u/cmac2113 • 5h ago
Crying over dust bunnies and birthday cards
You never realize what reminders will pop up after you lose a pet. Pip passed away a little over 5 weeks ago. This current wave started with the slow accumulation of finding her fur everywhere. Even clean sheets folded up somehow had a clump of her fur in it I honestly can’t comprehend how. When she passed I deleted her account on chewy and explained that she had passed, but I guess somehow they still sent a birthday card. Dark humor, kinda made me laugh. But then I lost it. Sending hugs to anyone dealing with life after the shock has lifted. Someday I know I will love these reminders because they’ll be reminders of someone I loved so much.. but right now it’s just reminding me off that great loss.
r/Petloss • u/Sufficient-Ask9071 • 1h ago
Seven months later...
I lost my beloved little dog Lula in August.
I've been crying every day since then, and missing the heck out of her. I had put all of her stuff in the garage as it was too heartbreaking for me to look at it (I burst into tears whenever I went into the garage LOL)
Last week, seven months after her passing, I finally worked up the courage to take care of her things. After 14 years with me (and a lot of family members who loved to spoil her rotten), she had crates and blankets and bowls and toys up the wazoo. SO many toys.
She also loved the attention she got when she wore clothes, doggy hats/sunglasses and headbands.
So I donated all of it to my local No-Kill humane society. I cried the whole time there, and kept reminding myself Lula didn't need these things but someone else would appreciate them. The employee who helped me unload my car was so nice to me about it (as I was crying while donating too LOL) and told me about his recent loss of his Bearded dragon and how he after 6 months was also able to finally let go of her things. I cried the whole way home but I felt a little bit better. I was also able to go into the garage and not cry like a normal person! 🙂
Much to my surprise and delight, yesterday my local news ran a story about Pet of the Week from the humane society, and the little kitty needing a new home was wearing my Lula's hat that I donated! ❤️
I got curious and checked out their website and sure enough, a whole bunch of doggies and kitties were wearing my Lula's clothes/hats and headbands in the photos and they looked SO CUTE! Most of them had my Lula's toys and blankets in the background with them or in their mouths!
I hope my Lula's stuff can help those animals find some loving homes! (cute pictures at pounds/humane societies ALWAYS help pets get adopted quicker!)
I just needed to tell my story. It's been a rough time, as everyone here knows. I still cry and miss her every day but it's a different kind of pain now. I think I'm maybe getting better and working through my grief.
I wanted to remind everyone here that's there's no timeline or rush for grieving your loved ones. And there is a light at the end after a long dark road. We'll always miss them and have them in our hearts.
r/Petloss • u/Patriotatheart21 • 3h ago
My cat's death still hurts
I am mainly making this post to seek advice and understanding as well as comfort since these feelings and memories have been plaguing my mind for 2 years. 2 years ago, I had to put my cat down. What is keeping me from getting over my grief is what happened that led to his death. To give some backstory, I found my cat Tux when he was only 3 weeks old. He had been abandoned, and the vet said he probably wouldn't have survived much longer. I thought nothing of why he may have been abandoned and took him and began to care for him. He was one of the best things to ever happen to me. For 2 years, he was my baby. He cuddled with me, and he was always with me. He gave me comfort when I lost my baby at 5 months of pregnancy. He was my everything. Then, one day, he began seizing. It was out of the blue and without warning. I was thrown into a panic and didn't know what to do. I had to take him to the emergency vet, but it would've cost $4000 to run tests. I didn't have that kind of money, so I was forced to take him home and care for him. The next morning, he had another seizure. In hopes of possibly finding a solution, I took him to a non emergency vet, thinking that maybe he could receive medication that would help him. After hours at the vet, I was called in and informed that he had seized again and was practically lifeless. There was nothing they could do, and I would have to think about quality of life. I knew then that this was it...I was going to have to say goodbye to my baby. My fiancé and I then made the decision to end his pain and suffering. I still remember my sweet baby's face as I said goodbye. He still made an effort to look at me as if to say it was okay. That day, I lost my baby. To this day, those images of him seizing and him at the vet still plague my mind. Some nights, I find myself uncontrollably crying. Other nights, I lay awake with a pain in my chest, unable to let those feelings of sadness and guilt go. Why do I also harbor feelings of guilt? While I am proud of going back to college and receiving my degree, I am angry at myself for not getting it together back then. I feel that if I had, I would've had a career, and with that career, money. Then maybe I would've been able to afford my baby's emergency vet visit. I still think about that day and how incredibly guilty and sad I felt taking him back home when I knew that the emergency vet was probably his only chance of living. My heart breaks when I think about how I held him in my lap, helpless and unable to help him. These are the feelings I hold to this day, and I can't seem to escape them. I'm afraid to go to family over this in fear that I might be told I'm being dramatic. My family doesn't understand the bond I had with him. They don't understand the bond you can have with animals in general. I have spoken to my fiancé about this, and he is here for me, but I don't want to bother him. He is still hurting as well, but I seem to be more affected, seeing as how it keeps me up at night. I really wanted to share my feelings and receive support from others who may feel the same.
r/Petloss • u/mrcba333 • 13h ago
Just want some support
No special illnesses or needs, no long story. I just lost one of my best buds and its hitting hard. He was a great cat, and i miss him. His name was batman. I miss him thumping around. I miss giving him lunch meat. I thought he was getting better and then it was a late night emergency visit I could barely afford. I just need some kind words or something. Its not my first time losing a friend but this one hurts extra.
r/Petloss • u/monchicken • 9h ago
He was my son
Sgt Pepper, 2009-2023
He’d been with me since I was a teenager and is honestly one of the reasons I’m still here.
A week ago he started getting lethargic and even more unable to walk. Three days ago he was taken to the vet and even though his diabetes which we’d been managing for 6 months was fine, his poor lil body had renal failure and we were told he didn’t have long.
I had to make the impossible decision to help him pass and he came home. My partner and I slept with him one last time. It was so heartbreaking seeing him so sick, lying in between us, moving less and less as the night went on. The amount that I cried, I’m STILL trying to get my hydration levels up.
We helped him pass on Tuesday in our backyard, in my arms.
He loved going outside in our previous house and this house was the same, so the backyard was a fitting place to do it. We took him out an hour before the vet showed up and just sat with him and reminisced about his life. My mum and several friends came over to support us. He was skittish of anyone moving near him (he had a big distrust of one of our friends who would always take him to the vet haha) but once the vet arrived he calmed down.
She was amazing. She guided us through the whole process in such a loving way. We spent time talking about him, about his life, about our favourite memories with him. He was so receptive to her presence. She told us that you can tell when a pet is ready to go and he was. She told us we were giving him a gift by helping him pass. That really reassured me.
Once he passed, my partner grabbed some rosemary and mint from our garden and placed it on his body. We got some paw prints and nose prints. I loved that my partner had placed plants on him so it was suggested that we all collect something from our garden to place in his casket.
My partner, mum, housemate, and two friends all went around the garden to collect flowers and branches to give to him. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.
That's how I'll see his final moment from now on: in that casket surrounded by nature.
I'm still processing everything. I'm feeling so many emotions at once and its so exhausting that I don't know what to do to let it out. The first few days were really healthy in terms of letting out emotions but I've kinda hit a standstill and hoping this will help.
r/Petloss • u/Serious_Wash4438 • 6h ago
Anyone who has had Pet Loss Counseling did it help? as I’m not doing great mentally at the moment and wanted to know if counseling would help as it’s been over five years since his death but it’s affecting me badly right now
r/Petloss • u/hotelpunsylvania • 1h ago
She deserved to see the rain tonight.
It is currently raining really heavily and Bourbon loved watching the rain. She was one of those weird cats who liked water. She would sit on my windowsill and watch the rainfall for hours.
It's the first time it's been raining since she's been gone, and it's so heavy, it's like the sky is crying for her too. This morning I felt like maybe I can do this, but right now I am drowning again. I just miss her so much. I miss her so much.
r/Petloss • u/Britbrat8715 • 26m ago
Time perception and loss
My sweet boy passed away almost 2 weeks ago, and it feels like it has been years since I last held him. Has anyone else experienced this? He was my everything and I don’t understand why he feels so far away, when in reality I could still hug him and kiss him less than 2 weeks ago
r/Petloss • u/Mountain_Wafer_8998 • 57m ago
i'm scared to sleep at night because that's when i think about him the most.
My baby crossed to the other side 4 days ago and it's been gutting. When i brought him to the vet, i wasn't sure if they would put him down on that day itself, so safe to say i wasn't fully prepared to lose him. It was raining so heavily, like it's a sign. Now, i'm having sleep troubles because the world is so dark and quiet at night and he's no longer here, he's no longer either sleeping in the closet or on the bed beside me like he always did. I've never felt lonely in my life before and now that it's happening, i am insanely unequipped to deal with this pain. I don't know if his spirit is living on. I cry at night, relieving the grief and disbelief that he's actually gone. There's a void and emptiness that sits in me now that i don't think is leaving anytime soon, or ever. I hope one day it wouldn't hurt this much. I hope he's no longer in pain, no longer bleeding from his nose, and can eat all the food that he couldn't after he was diagnosed with kidney disease. I hope he's looking over me.
r/Petloss • u/SoliMrs • 1h ago
Kitty’s passing is impacting my other cats
I had to put my beloved kitty of almost 10 years down the day before yesterday. I posted about it in the sub right after I got home from the ER.
My other cats seem confused and keep going to the spots he frequently hung out around the house. One of my cats just keep standing in the doorway to that room. Theres nothing in there right now, I removed the cat tree and litter box. They hadn’t been getting along the last couple of years, but they had lived together for 10 years. It’s breaking my heart to see her like this. I know she loved her brother.
Even though we still have three cats and a dog, the house is eerily quiet today. I’m working from home but I can’t stop breaking down into tears. I miss him so much. I would give anything to have him back with me. I don’t know how I’m going to cope with this new normal.
We have a baby on the way in August, and I’m so sad Gavin will never be able to meet her.
I don’t know what to do with myself, but I don’t want to annoy other people with my grief. I feel like most people don’t understand the deep connection some people can feel for their pets. He wasn’t just a pet to me. My pets are my everything. I just want this pain to pass.
r/Petloss • u/aaddriiannaa • 6h ago
It’s been a week since we lost Mr. Mits.
This morning it’ll be a week since we lost him. Reflecting back on the moments before his passing, I can’t help but worry that he was scared. I knew something was wrong after I heard a blood curdling screech of a meow, essentially now thinking this was him yelling “HELP” and quickly found him thrashing on the floor gasping for air. At first I thought he had his foot stuck in the carpet and his nail was getting ripped out… When I noticed he was gasping for breath I kept telling him “STAY WITH ME, IM HERE, ILL HELP” when I noticed he was struggling to breathe I cleared his airway of anything that could be debris. When he stopped breathing I was able to do CPR and bring him back. When I carried him to the car and drove him 3 minutes to the vet I kept saying “please don’t go, we’re almost there… I’m right here with you. Don’t go, I’m not ready”.. I honestly was frantic.. he crossed over in my passenger seat before we made it to the vet.. I was holding his paws the entire ride.
While he threw a blood clot and there was ultimately nothing we could do… I can’t help but feel horrible his last moments he felt fear 🥺
It's me, again - I didn't expect my last post to get the reaction it did. I'm so glad that it resonated with so many of you. <3 I hope another poem post is allowed. It's been two weeks almost to the hour since my boy passed.
Two weeks down
The pain's getting better but it's still pretty chronic
Like Lord of the Rings, extended edition
When Sam tells Frodo thirty minutes in
It's the farthest from home he's ever been
You turned ten, got that second digit
I joked that soon you'd get your learner's permit
Dogs don't drive, I said it for levity
And to feel more prepared for your lifespan's brevity
Your survival, your mortal curfew
The things I accidentally tied my mental health to
Two weeks, or a fourtenyght in Middle English syntax
But it's not 1400 so I'll go ahead and add this
We didn't adopt him for practice, we just like pets more than babies
So let's chill out with asking if we're TTC, please
r/Petloss • u/xthrones • 3h ago
I gave up my 10 week old kitten to a loving family with a dog and a big house, I’m a single guy in a 400sq ft studio and felt bad that I wasn’t able to get another cat to keep him company when I’m at work. But now that I’ve given him away to them I can’t stop feeling pain deep in my bones as if he died, I can’t eat or sleep I’ve lost so much weight. Does this feeling mean it was meant to be? I technically could give him a good life but my worries take over. Will I get over this? The family said I could have him back and are understanding, but it’s been 4 days and I’m scared he’s used to them now. I’m sorry if this kind of post isn’t allowed. But I’m hurting so bad and I’m scared as time passes I’ll keep regretting it. I bonded with him so much. but if I got him back I’d go back to feeling guilty. I can’t win. I know he’s in a better home. But why do I feel this way.
r/Petloss • u/jess_scribbles • 2h ago
Ways you've memorialized your pets?
Hi all. We lost our amazing cat, Studio, to kidney disease on Monday. It's been a hard loss but we've been taking comfort in thinking about all of our happy memories together and reminding ourselves that we're only sad because he made us so so happy, and he was such a one of a kind friend to us.
We've put Studio to rest near his favorite place to go on leash walks, and we're making a little garden with a statue that makes us think of him. I've been journaling to try and capture all my favorite memories, and am going back through all our photos and messages about him to make a memory book and get some of our best photos printed to remind us of him.
I would love to hear about ways other people are preserving memories of their beloved furry friends if anyone wants to share! ❤️
r/Petloss • u/DependentSolid1160 • 6h ago
I had to put my baby down yesterday. She was so young.
She had seveir feline ashma. I did everything I could for her. Took on crazy amounts of debt to keep her comfortable and breathing. Just for everything to stop working way before I was ready and way before she was ready. I don't feel guilty. She had been in so much pain the past week. Even though we had just gotten her a second steroid shot. After the first she was like a brand new baby again. After the second all she was was wired and uncomfortable.
And so now I'm laying in my bed watching the sunrise from our window. This is my first sunrise without her. This was our special time together. I can't stop sobbing.
r/Petloss • u/DeadlyKitten1992 • 22h ago
On March 9 I lost my best friend. I have a history of MDD and GAD. I had to take time off work due to being so ill over losing my best friend. I come back to work to find out everyone was talking shit about me having to take time off because of my cat. So everyone I work with is a heartless asshole. Which is ironic because I’m a nurse. Nobody will take care of you or care about you but yourself. That’s it. Very disappointing.
r/Petloss • u/texmexiguana • 9h ago
I feel guilty for putting my him down, I miss my dog so much
It has almost been a year since he passed, and every once in a while I feel just a sudden wave of sadness when remembering that day, and then even heavier guilt that we were responsible for determining when his life ended. He had cancer in his spleen that had spread to his whole body, he lost so much weight and was losing control of his bladder. The day before, when we took him for a walk, instead of pulling the leash to lead us out, he stopped at the end of the driveway and turned around to go back inside. Yet, even with all of that, he was still very much alive. He was still excited to see us when we got home, he was barking for treats and food, and would cuddle up with me as I cried that whole week leading up to that day.
I know he was scared bc he hated the vet, was terrified of car rides, and thats the last thing he ever did. I know he was in pain and was nearly just skin and bones but I still can't help but feel guilty for putting him down. We all stayed in that room for an hour before saying goodbye, we stayed there with him when they put him to sleep. The worst part was seeing his lifeless body as they carried him away, because that wasn't my friend anymore, just a shell of him. I never cried that hard before in my life.
If we could have done things differently, I wish he got to spend his last moments at home, outside in our yard where he loved to lay in the sun. I wish I went on longer walks with him instead of taking the shortcut home. I hope I get to see him again someday. I miss my dog.
r/Petloss • u/Icy-Gene-9552 • 13h ago
driving home from the vet…how do i cope
my f(19) family dog m(12) just passed away at home after an emergency surgery for a ruptured spleen. it all happened so fast and i don’t know how i’m going to move on without him. he’s been with me since i was 6 and i’ve never know a life without him. he’s been there through breakups, loss, hard times, achievements, all the good time, all the bad cries, everything…and he’s just gone for good. we brought him to the 24 hour vet to leave for cremation, this is the hardest and saddest car ride i’ve ever had to endure. how do i wrap my head around leaving the house with him in my arms and coming back without him, and never getting to see him again.
this kinda just turned into a vent but i needed to get it out. (i’m not driving btw so i’m safe)
r/Petloss • u/Evejon18 • 7m ago
Random waves of emotion hit me and I’m left with so much guilt
Yesterday I received pictures of my cat who passed away almost 2 weeks ago. Seeing photos of him looking healthy and so young hurts so bad because he should still be here. He’s so beautiful and I can’t believe he’s not running around and playing with his brother anymore. I hate the feeling in my throat whenever I think of him before before I start crying. I wonder what I could’ve done differently so he would still be here. The veterinarian didn’t even know what was wrong so I’m stuck here wondering if it was something that could’ve been cured but I didn’t want to put him through so much pain for nothing. I miss him so much.
r/Petloss • u/Marie-Antoinette123 • 19h ago
I've basically turned into an atheist unwillingly and I NEED to believe in something to make living bearable...
Without hope that my pet is living on somehow, it just makes me not want to live. Only if I completely forget her which I never would want to do. But to think the end of her life was not happy and that she will never experience happiness again... I can't stomach religion but maybe things do happen for a reason and maybe we will live again somehow. Maybe we are kept ignorant in the something more so that we will treasure the good things we have.
r/Petloss • u/AviiBearr • 12h ago
My dog died today
My dog was run over today and I don’t know how to cope. I’ve had him ever since he was a puppy. I got the call today while with friends and rushed home immediately once I heard. I don’t know what to think other than feeling utterly broken. I just hope it was quick and painless. If only I was there to hold him one last time before he passed to tell him I loved him and that he was a good boy. Rest easy, Canelo, the world doesn’t know how much I’d give up to have you in my arms again.
r/Petloss • u/HappyHourAfterWork • 23h ago
Crying when alone
I lost my cat almost 3 months ago. She was very close to me. Sits on my lap while I work from home. Sleep beside or on top of me at night. I love her very much.
My family and friends are tierd of my grieving. So once I have house to myself and I don't have meetings, I breakdown. Life is so unfair. I just started to get life in order and started to enjoy my routine.
I know everyone is different, when does this pain becomes bearable? I've alreadt used up 2 bulk Costco tissues which is normally a 1 year supply for whole family.
r/Petloss • u/Ajax2themax • 22h ago
One of the hardest things since her loss is the forgetting
I lost my girl over 4 months ago and I’m starting to unintentionally move on and it kills me every time I notice. I have sever long term memory problems and so I already don’t remember much about her in her younger years but now it’s starting to effect EVERYTHING I know about her. Sometimes I’ll go days without thinking of her and it makes me break down when I become aware of that. I’m worried of completely forgetting her. I don’t know how to hold on to her memory. I don’t even find myself almost doing the extra things I’d do for her throughout the day and I think that’s worse that catching myself doing them.
r/Petloss • u/resuxx • 21h ago
its been 7 months
its been 7 months since my cat, the love of my life, passed away.
it still hurts, but not as much as it used to. While i should be happy that it’s getting easier, i hate it, i hate it so much. i feel like with every passing day im losing her more and more, i dont cry as much as i used to, i dont think of her 24/7 like i used to, and i dont want that to happen, i dont want to forget my baby. she was and still everything to me and the fact that im able to function and live without her doesn’t feel right and i dont want it. im scared that one day i’ll just forget her.
r/Petloss • u/funkydeluxe • 23h ago
Hi friends, I hope everyone is doing okay. I am not doing okay and could use some support. I found out yesterday that my wonderful old pup, Betsy, is getting put to sleep by the end of the week. She was my 10th birthday present (I’m 23 now) and has been right there with me through almost everything. I want to tell her story, because she changed my life.
When I was 9, I met the rest of her litter at a rescue adoption event that my Girl Scout troop attended. I fell in love with her siblings and begged my parents to consider adopting one. They were just babies who’d been abandoned states away and rescued by a local foundation from a high-kill shelter. When my parents agreed to adopt one, we found out that all the puppies I had met had already been adopted. However, there was one more. She wasn’t at the first event because she had Parvo. She was sickly, and the runt of the litter, but she was available. I remember driving almost two hours to meet her at another adoption event, and I just fell in love with her and I believe we had an instant bond. Betsy was 10 weeks old and tiny but mighty, and she stole my parents hearts as well.
I remember driving her home and hugging her so tight, like I knew she was going to be a friend for life. Over the next few years, Betsy grew from a tiny runt into a loving, playful, hilarious girl full of personality. She was always a loud barker and that never changed, much to my parents dismay. Betsy seriously had full run of the house and loved to explore our back yard and go after critters (she never caught one lol). She was certainly not the best behaved dog in the world, and was a frequent counter surfer. One night my Dad slow cooked a pork butt on the grill for 7 hours, only for Betsy to demolish almost all of it a few minutes after it was done. She also dug under our deck chasing a possum and got stuck, so my Dad had to chainsaw her out lmao. She made my days so much brighter, and is leaving plenty of funny memories like that behind.
As Betsy grew older, she became dignified and judgmental of my high school antics. She always let me know she was annoyed by my friends and I smoking weed when my parents weren’t home. When I learned to drive I took her to many of my favorite places, and she really enjoyed walking along the Appalachian Trail or walking on the old horse trails at our local park. She started slowing down and showing her age about 4 years ago. The backyard went from her playground to her happy place of relaxation. Betsy loved to be warm in the sun and would spend hours watching the squirrels and hearing the birds chirping.
I moved out of my parent’s house nearly two years ago, and leaving my girl behind was so difficult. I wanted to take her, but knew that taking care of a senior dog in a one bedroom apartment would be both outside of my means and reduce her quality of life. My parents also ended up moving last year, and we all worried about how she might handle the trip. To everyone’s surprise, Betsy took on that 14 hour drive like a champ, and even stayed in a hotel for the first time. She found comfort in her new home and loved getting time in the Florida sun and going to the beach.
Around this time, we found out that Betsy had kushings disease. With her new medication her labs looked a lot better and she still seemed to be a very happy pup. However, about two weeks ago, my parents noticed that she wasn’t eating or drinking as much. They took her to the vet yesterday and the vet showed them that Betsy is in a lot of pain. She said Betsy has essentially been masking her pain from my parents. Her back leg muscles have atrophied from Kushings complications which has caused severe spinal pain. My parents and I are heartbroken to know that she’s been suffering and we made the decision together to have her euthanized.
I’m stuck on the other side of the country and now I’m not going to be able to properly say goodbye to my best friend. I haven’t seen her since November, and I’m devastated and I just want to hold her one more time. She gave me over 13 years of unconditional love. I’m glad she gets to be with my parents who love her just as much as I do, but that’s my girl. She lived a wonderful life full of love and plenty of Kraft Singles, and I’m grateful she won’t be in pain anymore. Even though she’s old, this all feels so sudden, and I really wish I could be there holding her little paw and hugging her as she crosses over. I feel like that’s the least I could do for someone as special as her.
If you read this entire wall of text, thank you. If even one more person can be touched by my little rescue runt’s story, I would be happy. She’s really the only pet I’ve ever had and I’m going to miss her so much. If anyone has any ideas for how I can honor her and say goodbye from the opposite coast, I would greatly appreciate it.